Friday, March 7, 2008

Friday the 7th.

Don't know what to title this blog cause so much just happened today... I would have written this post in an emo mood but then I just had a really fun and interesting DotA game with Dill and Ian which really brightened up my whole day and was a good way to end it =) thanks guys! Well anyway, the lineup of events today...

First chem SPA which was quite screwed but thanks Mr H! hahaha
Next just went with Vincent to the hostel to do GP essay... which obviously wasn't finished.
Then went back to school to collect A level results for Chinese...

That's when the eventful day really started... At first I didn't even dare to get my results.. as I was half expecting to see a smiley face without the eyes (as I have been describing to my friends) AKA a U =) Well, eventually I did and wow surprise! I did see one haha! I have to admit.. Even though I knew my Chinese just totally sucks, I kinda expected a U and I was supposedly prepared to get one, I was indeed quite upset and quite disappointed.

I don't really know what happened after that, I kinda just blanked out... never even thought I would be that disappointed over a U. But one part I do remember is that Dillon, Eleanor and Yihui were all part of the uhhh... the U club? haha that's it man. The mark of a true blue ACSian ^^ ok fine and a... MGnian whatever =x

Well, I always thought I could accept things as they come, thought that I could always look on the bright side of things no matter what happens.. I was proved wrong today. A simple expected U actually caused me so much disappointment and I just thought everything around was just... nothing.

Went to emo at sky garden... looked down to the people around AC... went to seek God for a moment and... do the utterly horrendousgusting horrigible GP essay.

Ok so at around 4.45 I handed it in to the STI and went for CF.. the J3s were there! ! . ! . . . ... They weren't exactly super happy. From what I know or at least felt, they didn't really get he grades they wanted or expected. Kind of like my situation earlier today but then I heard DWong tell some other J3: Well, I'ld say I'm happy with what God gave me. Perhaps, God knows perfectly well what He's doing =)

Today's CF was supposed to be the 40 DOC but Isaac decided to change it to a session of extended worship. Exactly what I needed at that point in time. It could be quite clearly seen that the other J2s and J3s needed that time of seeking God too.

Worship was wonderful. It was quite some time ago that I shed tears before the LORD. Today, tears began falling for some reason and I just didn't know why. But on reflecting, I guess I knew that I haven't been seeking God at all. I seemd to have fallen away again and I didn't really do anything about it. The past week of term exams were simply just a period which sapped all my time and I just felt so... depressed in a way. Nothing seemed to be going right. The GP paper wasn't too fantastic, the maths paper was flunked for sure, econs was never good, chem only told me I didn't study properly and Bio wasn't too easy either. An overdue GP essay wasn't helping at all. Somehow I felt I was totally lost and when I did seek God, I didn't really spend much time. As always, worship ministered to me and today it surely did once again.

Isaac came up shortly to me and Dill telling us to pray for the people who responded to his altar call... Personally I wasn't really prepared to do so. I mean, how could I pray for others when I myself need prayer? Well, God led me in the right direction. A short prayer to Him and I went ahead praying for the others.

I love Christian Fellowship =) It just seems to be THE place where I can just lay down all my burdens before the throne of God and step into His presence feeling so carefree and all ready to praise Him.

Today was very meaningful to me...

First, it signifies the END OF EXAMS AND THE START OF HOLS :D :D
But more importantly, I came back into God's loving arms today and I can now add the two eyes to my Chinese grade =') Thanks LORD.

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