Recommitment

To recommit oneself... recommit to God. That's always one of the options provided by AC during REW when slips of paper are given out to everybody.

It seems like a good thing if a child of His ticks that box to say, God, I want to recommit my life to you once again. But what does it mean? It means that the child of His has strayed away, not giving two hoots about who God is, not caring about what He thinks, and just living a life like He never existed... To recommit, would mean that that child of God has realised this, and wants to go back into His arms. To recommit, it means that uncommitment had previously occurred.

The past few months have been rough - spiritually and in other fields too. While I found myself drifting, I found myself yearning to be back my God's side... but how many times must I recommit myself to God? How many times must I stray from Him before I truly stay with Him and in His word? How many times must I live my life as if I never knew God before?

Recommitment sounds like a good thing, but on a daily basis? Oh, for sure not.

My LORD, I pray I won't have a chance to recommit myself to you again, for if I'm always committed to You, recommitment isn't an option. May You keep me by Your side, now, and forever more, amen.

M5

Hard to believe that the final year starts in less than 10 hours time.

The past 4 years have been very eventful indeed. Apart from the mundane clinical work and studying on and off, it has been a real eye opener in the wards - learning experiences and heartfelt moments at anytime and anywhere. Doctors, patients, their families, there's always a learning point somewhere if you care enough to look.

The past few weeks in electives has made it even clearer that how much change one can make is really dependent only on how much time you are willing to spend. Everybody has a story to tell which will influence how the perfect care plan for them is carried out. In the general flow of things in the wards, patients are seen as diseases, nothing more. But if we are willing to take that one extra mile to see the disease as a patient, and to treat the patient rather than the disease, so much more can be done. Changing the life of one patient: it may not mean much in the healthcare system as a whole, but it will mean a world of difference to the patient who is being treated.

In the coming year, though unlicensed, it seems that we are actually working as doctors in the wards. Though it may be so easy to forget about these small things that can be done, it will be worthwhile to note that they can make big differences to the patients. I hope and pray that no matter how bad or tiring things get, I will still remember to treat patients, instead of treating diseases.

May the year ahead be filled with opportunities, both for learning, and for changing lives, God being my helper

You are Everything

Lifehouse's Everything Skit - somehow this skit came to mind on the way home. It was first introduced to me during the Khon Khaen 2007 mission trip to Thailand where we felt this video would speak to the Church over there. And indeed it does. It's such a powerful video depicting the Christian life.

It starts from the time of creation, where God brought us to life, making us trees, birds, everything around us, for us. We lived in harmony, living as one with God, enjoying nothing but the sweet fellowship with Him.

Then sin comes in and draws our attention away from God. Passion, greed, alcohol, pursuit of beauty comes in, with many more distractions in our lives, not included in the video. The first sin pulls us from God; our desire for worldly things snatches us away even when we know we want to turn back to Him. With each successive sin, God is blocked out and pushed away from the picture, further.. and further... Until we reach a point, where we become hopelessly empty. Nothing in life seems to be worth living for. Nothing seems to be going well for us. Nobody seems to be around for us. Our lives are just a total wreck, each day just passes in despair, we feel depressed and driven to the brink of insanity...

But, God's love for us is boundless. He sent His Son Jesus Christ to die on the Cross just for our sakes, such that we are able to turn back to Him, regardless of the sin that had possessed us. And as the Bible very clearly states, as we draw closer to God, He will draw closer to us. In a desperate attempt to recommit our lives to God, we fight with our sin. We struggle with them. We may be thrown down and weighed down by our sins which have held us down for so long. But we aren't alone. God is on the other end, pulling us towards Him. He wants to bring us back to Him. He always wanted that, even while we were engulfed in our own lives. In the process of reconciliation, our sin is washed away from us, we are made whole again. And finally, when we can no longer take it, Jesus bears the burden for us. He takes the weight of all our sins upon His own shoulders. He shelters us and gives us refuge under His arms...

It is then, when we repent and seek God, He frees us from what has chained us and we are able to reconcile with Him, and enjoy the Holy relationship that was meant to exist from the very start.

I've probably watched this video at least 5 times now. And each time, without fail, I would tear. I am repeatedly reminded of how I've drifted away from God, but how all these while, He is always there for me, always waiting to receive me again. How He is always ready to shoulder my burden, if only I ask. How true joy can only come when I am in Him alone.

Find me here, and speak to me
I want to feel You, I need to hear You
You are the Light that's leading me to the Place
Where I find peace again

You are the strength that keeps me walking
You are the hope that keeps me trusting

You are the life to my soul
You are my purpose
You're everything
And how can I stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?


You calm the storms and you give me rest
You hold me in your hands
You won't let me fall
You steal my heart and you take my breath away
Would you take me in, take me deeper now
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?


Cause you're all I want, you're all I need
You're everything, everything
You're all I want
You're all I need
You're everything, everything
You're all I want
You're all I need
You're everything, everything
You're all I want
You're all I need
Everything, everything

And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better-any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Good Friday

"But the servant was pierced because we had sinned. He was crushed because we had done what was evil. He was punished to make us whole again. His wounds have healed us." - Isaiah 53:5

It's always a time in the year where we once again commemorate the death of our LORD Jesus Christ upon the cross. Being thankful that He has been the sacrificial Lamb for our sins and remembering how we can only come to the Father through Him.

The message of the Gospel is so simple and yet so profound. It all revolves around the love that God has for us, how He wants us to have the best and how he wishes good for all of us. Good Friday is yet another reminder to us about this great love that He had, has and always will have for us. It reminds us that Christianity isn't so much of a religion, but of a relationship.

Grace is giving us what we do not deserve, while mercy is taking away what we deserve.